over-responsible ??
Yesterday’s ghost, guilt, ended with, “Its too much for me.” Veiled in those final two words is the twisted thinking of the ghost of over-responsibility. We’ve all heard of being irresponsible, now for peak at the flip-side.
If only I had be braver, stronger, faster, smarter, … I could have prevented, averted, stopped, fought against, fixed … all of this … every attack, all the pain, every tear … of every one.
If only I had hidden better, there would be no pain.
If only I could simply be good, he would not need to punish me.
And he would not be disappointed.
And mommy would not be so upset.
If only I were not such a fraidy-cat, weakling, pennywaste, push-over … I could have protected everyone, stood up to them, turned them in, spoken out.
Such are the twisted thoughts and lies of this ghost. Believing one is personally responsible for another person’s choices. Illogical, yes. Vulcan, no. I think children in an abusive home adopt this battered-wife “I pushed him to it” syndrome.
Our broken society promotes this ghost in not so subtle ways. A 13 year old girl is called a whore while Roman Polanski is hailed as a film making genius. I remember after another 13 year old girl was assaulted at a church in my past, the mother told me the pastor in counseling her (the mother) said, “We both know the boy is not the only one at fault here.”
This ghost invades the minds and hearts of everyone… and he needs to go, in Jesus’ name.
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Filed under: Faith, Family, Learning, Life, mountains | Tagged: abuse, Ghosts, survivors
another case of extreme thinking and putting as much as possible of the focus on ME – memememememememememe it’s all about me.
a particularly nasty and obvious trait of our ego’s.who want all the power and control for themselves in whatever situation we ‘relate’ to.
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AMEN.